Zenith of my pains

At the zenith of my pains, I have started to realize the dawn of a new self in me. The desperate pain in my heart is caused due to the nearing bereavement from my institution after four years, which is nothing but the fundamental consequence of institutionalization. The possibility of loosing some good ties that has its roots in this institution also makes me worry. But of all it is the losses that I had in this campus that makes the situation more painful.
The losses may be of the most importance than the gains. Of all losses, the most one is I have my character and have ended up loosing my all confidence and my goals and my views of the future. My ambitions, which were nourished and watered by myself and by those who had depended on me, were crushed by the unknown entity that had conspired through various mediums to ensure the brutal destruction. Thus I was left with nothing by an utter realization that the complete failure was not the ultimate painful experience. The realization of the various levels of insubordination, insults and deprivation of opportunities has made me believe that all those years of pain and efforts that I had taken up in reaching in reaching this position has been in vain. A major part of my life has thus been wasted. Now what is a definite question that needs a definite answer. But can I find an answer for it, I don’t know.
Left behind are some of the most brutal memories, memories that have influenced and changed everything in me. My likes, dislikes, habits, hobbies and so on, have been altered in these four years. Oh oh oh I don’t know whether to cry over the lost opportunities and the stolen chances. Can I be strong again…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….


Only time will tell. So I have to stay till it passes by. Waiting not knowing whether it will be a gentle breeze or a sandstorm that may cover up the entire path that lies to be trodden and the path that has been so far trodden. What a pity!!!!!!!!!!!